Tuesday, October 26, 2010

D Day Plus 217: (October 11, 2010): Distractions, Distractions, Distractions

Ever since Dad said, “Then, don’t” on Lake Philpott, I relaxed. I felt you again. I felt so much better. Now there were glimmers of light streaming down slicing the darkness into manageable slices. I guess I was holding on too tight and got way ahead of myself. And that is what stopped the flow.

It’s funny how well your mind works if you just let it be. Can you believe last night I had a dream about keeping busy and distracted – not to run away – but as a way to relax and let good things in? Needless to say, I woke up with distraction on the brain. It was my number one priority. And it worked. The more I distracted myself with Zumba dancing, training on Lynda.com, or sewing projects, the inspiration just came. I even decided to memorize Excel power shortcuts and the attributes of different fabrics for draping and designing clothes: geeky and freaky -- maybe? But it was so me.

I had a major epiphany when I was talking to Morgan during her lunch break. She had to work on Columbus Day. Dad and I had the day off because it was Federal Holiday. I told her not to worry – that things always work out – and she’d get more time off in the future. Anyway, Morgan called me during lunch and got me caught up on her weekend in Sterling with her future in-laws -- the Nelsons. Remember David, that really shy guy who was head over heels about your sister, the one who wore cowboy boots in the summer? Anyway they’re getting married, the same day that Grandma and Grandpa Jones did.

David is Morgan’s Katie. Both Katie and David were the ones who stole my heart when they first landed on the Jones scene when you and Morgan were awful teenagers. You and Morgan both put me through the ringer when things went south with David and Katie– but I stood by you guys. Old news, I know. But I always like to point out when I’m right. I was right. They were the ones!

By the way, did you have anything to do with David and Morgan? I only ask because, the night before your body finally caught up with your soul, she was really sad. I mean really said. But then again, weren’t we all? She was on the verge of breaking up with her long time boyfriend, but was holding on because she wanted someone who knew you. I told her that she needed someone to soften her rough edges and to bring out her best. She wanted someone who knew how awesome you were, someone who would open the car door for her, and make her feel like a princess. I knew something was up with the door thing because that is one of the things you loved about Katie: she always opened driver’s side whenever she got in the car. You loved loved loved that! Well anyway, the night before we went to Hawaii, Morgan and David met to catch up on life. To make a long story short – sparks flew and David was just as much a part of our trip to Hawaii as Dad, Katie, and Morgan. You probably already know all this stuff, but you know my penchant for putting things into context.

I guess I’d better get back to the phone call and get on point. I know I'm yadda yaddaing things a bit. Morgan had an equally sad day yesterday because she missed you. She was with all of her future in-laws including brother and sister-in-laws and their kids. They were celebrating the blessing of their latest addition, David's niece. It was sort of Norman Rockwellish. And she had a mini meltdown. She wasn’t going to have any of that with you.

After Morgan and I fully established that yesterday was indeed sort of a crappy day – even though there were some good parts—we moved on to her latest wedding shenanigans. That is when the epiphany hit me. I could change things up a bit on D Day Minus to tell your story. I could pick out thirty or less of the most memorable and pivotal events. I didn’t have to have all the answers.  I didn't need to know how to handle the helplessness that consumed me when the cancer came back. You’d let me know what to do. You would. I just knew it.

2 comments:

  1. =) Greg brought a lot of people together even in his passing. He put others before himself. I love you, Greggy.

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